Hello from cloud nine! I mean yeah it’s pink up here. Like really PINK. Every time someone asks me how we are doing I tell them we’re good. Great actually. A perfect family of four. J isn’t jealous. She adores her little sister like she’s always been here with us. F sleeps like a baby. Only one drink a night. And I can run the stairs and play hide and seek again. So halleluya. But we all know there’s no such thing as perfect or pink only. Thank god for that. And because I like to think of myself as some kind of god or goddess I’d like to tell you the truth about cloud nine.
PINK is for perfect. We all know that.
YELLOW is for poop spray tans right before you have to pick up your oldest kid and you’re already late. Or for changing a diaper at night with a teeny tiny light on and thinking you’ve nailed it. Until you wake up with yellow bed sheets and body parts.
GREY is for dead, dry and itchy skin because apparently hormones had huge skin benefits as well.
NUDE is for shapewear which is desperatly needed because the babyless bump looked cuter with a baby in it (equals fucked up muscles).
PURPLE is for your old bikini which you’ll never wear again.
RED is for polishing your nails right before the baby wakes up screaming and you run upstairs to check and shhhhh but she won’t stop. You carefully pick her up, because hey nail polish, and put her down after a little while. Only to see that her nose and eyebrows have the same red as your nails. Means not removable without agression.
RED is also for your bank account because the maternity leave shopping spree never stopped (you definitely need twenty three baby blankets).
WHITE is for the giant sanitary napkins because the damn bleeding won’t stop for at least 6 weeks.
BROWN is for the mailman’s shocked eyes when you open the door with your boob peeking out of your shirt.
BLUEISH BROWN is for that same boob’s well used nipple.
BLACK is for the clothes you used to wear but turned out inconvenient because of baby puke all over.
GREEN is for envious girl when you see other girls drink more than one glass of wine on a terrace laughing with their best friends and flirting with hot bartenders, wearing slim fit everything.
ORANGE is for the digitals on my alarm clock which say 4:03 am right now because I’m nursing her with my shapewear still on and poop on my feet.
Anything to add anyone? Please do!
Photo from my pinterest