What the hell woman

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I have this observing baby. Watching my every step. Frowning her eyebrows. And giving me that ‘what the hell woman’ look. Very often. I don’t blame her for that.

I mean how freaky must it be for a baby to see a big head get closer and closer. Ready to hit target and then BOOM. The Head wiggles and produces a sharp sound and says brainless things like “well hellooo there. Hellooooo. Yes. Hellooooo. Couckouuuuu. Yes there you are. Yes. Helloooooo”. Not sparing with a somewhat funky breath. And when the Baby starts pouting her lips because she doesn’want to make a scene right away, the Head gets a brilliant idea and pops a nipple like chewy thing in her mouth. As if the Baby could say anything anyway. And to get rid of the Head she just sucks the damn thing and pretends to close her eyes. She opens and rolls them once in a while because she can’t help but feel annoyed. But the Head thinks she’s asleep. REM sleep to be specific because that’s the stage of eyerolling and smiles. The truth is that the baby laughs at the Head for being such an idiot. Talking to babies as if their IQ just dropped 80 points. So yeah what the hell woman!

Guilty.

X the Head

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